A Gift for Workerbee73
Feb. 20th, 2012 07:57 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
scifishipper.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
pilots_presentsTitle: The Way It Should Be
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
embolalia
Summary: Lee Adama heads home for spring break to join the Occupy CapCity protest and finds himself questioning everything.
Characters: Kara/Lee, Sam, Helo, Gaeta, Hoshi, Zak
Rating: R
Warnings: mentions of past child abuse
Beta Thanks: ALL the thanks towicked_sassy for her help!
Author Notes: Written forworkerbee73 for the song prompt “Box Full of Letters” and the lyrics I wish I had a lotta answers/'Cause that's the way it should be/All these questions/Being directed at me... Also for the comment that you don’t mind AUs
I
Lee slams the door as he gets out of the car, twenty minutes of angry silence expressed in the gesture. His mother takes off with a screech. He shakes his head in frustration and drops his tent, swinging his pack onto his back.
As he turns toward the camp, he catches a girl watching him. She’s perched on the stone wall that runs the perimeter of the dozen city blocks that make up Greystone Park, and she’s looking at him like she saw everything that just happened.
He flinches under her gaze. When he meets her eyes, she offers a lopsided smile. He feels his heart start to pound. For a moment Lee thinks he must know her.
“Hey, Adama!”
Lee turns at the sound of Felix’s voice, then drops his pack as his friend runs up to hug him. When he turns back, the girl is gone.
“You’re finally here!” Felix continues. “Come on, we’ve already staked out some ground.” He grabs Lee’s tent and starts leading the way into the Occupy CapCity encampment, explaining who else from their high school class has joined the movement while they’re home for spring break. Lee half-listens, trying to take everything in, trying to catch sight of her again.
He’s been to Greystone Park before of course, it’s hard to walk around downtown Caprica City without going past it or through it, but everything looks different now. The obelisk monuments have been co-opted as tent poles and the others have signs and artwork draped over them proclaiming the myriad political statements of the camp’s hordes.
Mess tents and portable toilets are scattered throughout the camp, their combined smells overpowering as Lee and Felix pass too close. The park seems to be crammed with people, old and young, speaking every language of the twelve colonies. It’s nothing like the smaller site the students at his college have created. Compared to theirs, this is huge. Lee cracks a smile, riding the energy of the people around him. They might actually get something accomplished.
“And here we are,” Felix proclaims, setting Lee’s tent down in a narrow patch of bare ground. “Louis and I have ours set up just there,” he points. “This whole area is mostly college kids.”
“Thanks,” Lee nods, setting his bag down and starting to unwrap his tent. “It’ll be good to see everyone.” He grins at Felix. It will, too. He hasn’t talked to most of their friends since he headed off to University in the fall, and there’s something comforting about being around people who know him again.
“Anyway, I’ll let you unpack. The daily meeting is at seven and it’s already past six.”
“Sounds good.” Lee glances around again as his friend leaves. Maybe she’ll be there.
***
Halfway through the meeting, Lee feels shell-shocked. On campus, there was an order to things. Someone made a point, someone rebutted, everybody voted. Here there’s total chaos.
Felix has been trying to get the group to vote on designating bathroom cleaning crews for more than half an hour, and people won’t stop asking unrelated questions and dragging the group off task. Every so often, someone starts ranting about the police forces and their right to be there and the group breaks into frantic cheering for a few minutes until someone else manages to restore order.
“This is ridiculous,” he mutters. “Is this really what we’re all here for?”
“Well go and say something,” Louis offers. “Isn’t that what we’re all here for?”
Lee nods nervously, then stands up, waiting at the edge of the podium and turning the question over in his mind. What are they there for? Because tuition is outrageous and the head of Greystone Industries makes in a day what his father makes in a year in the military. Because the school system is crap and he’s heard stories about rampant religious intolerance on Gemenon and starving children on Tauron. Because...
Felix gestures at him, urging him onto the small platform. “Go ahead,” he hisses, handing Lee the megaphone.
“Hi,” Lee says, staring out across the crowd, uncertain what it is he wants to say. “I’m Lee. And I just--I just wanted to tell you that...we need to just clean up the bathrooms and move on. There are more important things to talk about...”
“Frak yeah, spring break!” a girl’s voice interrupts.
Lee’s eyes snap up to find the blond girl he saw earlier. Laughter washes through the crowd as he doesn’t answer. She’s grinning at him, her expression a flagrant dare. “We have to bring justice to the Twelve Colonies!” he finally stammers into the megaphone, but no one’s listening. Felix takes it from him gently, without making eye contact.
“Don’t worry about it,” he mutters.
Lee slips back to his seat, his cheeks burning. On campus, surrounded by other college students, everyone listens when he speaks. He’s been a leader of Occupy ApolloU since it got started.
“For what it’s worth, you were right,” Louis says.
He shrugs. “Yeah...”
“That girl, Starbuck--she just disrupts everything.”
“Starbuck?” Lee asks quickly.
Louis tries to hide a grin. “She kind of...heckles. I think she might come drunk.”
Lee twists around, trying to see if she’s still there. If she is, she’s changed seats. “Excuse me,” he mutters, and climbs over Louis’ legs. “I’ll be back.” Before the other man can protest, he slips out of the meeting tent.
He steps outside and there, as if he’s conjured her up, is Starbuck. Her back is to him, her head tilted up to look at the stars coming out. Smoke wafts from a cigarette hanging precariously from her fingers.
“Yeah?” she drawls after a minute.
Lee lets out half a laugh at being caught. Then she turns and he can’t seem to breathe, let alone laugh.
“Well?” her eyes are bright and teasing. She’s absolutely beautiful.
“Do you really disagree with me?” he asks intensely. “Don’t you think we should be working together here?”
For just a moment Starbuck’s face is open, her eyes searching his. “I don’t think a bunch of college kids in tents are going to change the system much, if that’s what you’re asking,” she bites out. Her eyes drop to his chest and Lee is uncomfortably aware that APOLLO is blazed across his sweatshirt in gold letters.
Lee tilts his head. “Where do you go to school?”
She snorts. “I don’t.”
He looks closer at her: she’s definitely no older than he is. He’s not sure quite what to make of her answer, but he holds out his hand. “I’m Lee Adama.”
“Starbuck!” a voice calls from the main entrance to the meeting space. She twists to look over her shoulder, and Lee sees two tall young men waving her over. She grins.
“I’m Starbuck,” she says, grinning, and turns away, leaving him standing there with his hand stuck out. Lee watches one of them sling an arm around her shoulders, grabbing her cigarette and taking a long inhale. The other musses her hair and leans in to say something. All of them laugh; the sound rings out in the quiet of the evening.
Lee shakes his head in awe as he heads back inside. Someone at the front is ranting about the dark side of Colonialism, but he barely hears it. She talked to him.
***
Kara wakes up with someone’s elbow in her ribs. She shoves it away and sits up. Sam’s rolled in his sleeping bag overnight, ending up half on top of her. Helo is awake on her other side, propped up on one elbow, reading a book.
“Morning,” he says softly when he sees she’s awake.
She slides back into her cocoon of blankets, resting her head on her arms. “Yup.”
“Want to hear?”
Kara nods.
He reads aloud, something about detectives and murderers and the streets of Delphi. It’s a different book than yesterday; that was about the beaches of Triton and a love scene that made his ears burn. Kara curls into the sound of his voice, relaxing as she listens. She met Helo in foster care when they were both twelve. He had two black eyes; she had ten broken fingers. But where she was angry at the world, he was calm. He’d sit sometimes with the youngest kids, the three- and four-year-olds, telling them stories or reading picture books. Kara smiles at the memory.
“What?” Sam asks suddenly, sitting bolt upright behind her.
Kara turns, giggling at him. “Dreaming?”
He snorts, shakes it off. “I guess.”
She grins. “Okay, boys. I need to pee, then we can talk about Sam’s need to sleep on top of me.” Climbing over their legs as they protest, she pulls on her jeans, then unzips the tent flap and steps, blinking, into bright sunlight.
***
Kara takes her breakfast to the picnic tables while Helo and Sam head to the church down the street to sneak in and shower. She’s halfway through a packaged pastry when a kid wanders up, his designer jeans and pristine backpack marking him as either a newcomer or lost. But his eyes are excited and he’s clearly harmless. Kara grins ferally.
“Can I sit?” he asks, pointing to the other bench. “I’m just waiting for my brother.”
“Go for it, kid,” she says with false enthusiasm.
“I’m Zak,” he says.
“Mm.” Kara keeps eating, watching him patiently.
“Have you been here long? My mom’s all worried about my brother, that it’ll be too cold or he’ll get in trouble with the cops or something. I had to take the train just cause she wouldn’t come down here again, you know?”
Kara nods through his rambling. “Well,” she says, leaning in a little. “I’ve been here for four months. And it’s true, the cops come through. Usually at night. This one time they brought their dogs - you’ve seen them?” she lowers her voice as his eyes go wide. “One of them bit clean through my jeans, I just barely got away.”
Zak looks both terrified and completely in love. “Holy frak!”
She grins. “And another time--”
“Zak? How’d you get down here?”
She turns sharply and finds the guy from last night. Lee. Her stomach flips for just a second, remembering the way he looked at her. “So Apollo’s your big brother!” she teases, covering.
Lee raises an eyebrow. “Sorry if he was bothering you.”
“Did you know the cops come with dogs?” Zak asks eagerly.
Lee turns to her warily. Kara offers a shit-eating grin. “They do. They have dogs.”
“I took the train,” Zak says, answering Lee’s earlier question. “Mom was way too hungover to drive, and I wasn’t about to go in her room to get the keys. Gods only know what she would’ve done.”
Kara’s eyes leap to Lee’s. His face is frozen in shock for a moment before he blinks his eyes closed. She looks away, too. The silence stretches out. “Well, you made it!” Kara finally says to Zak. She catches Lee’s look of gratitude.
“Yeah. Hey, you should hang out with us!” Zak suggests.
She laughs. “I’ve got things to do, kid, but you have fun.” She crumples up her food wrapper and tosses it at the nearest trashcan. When it misses by an inch, Lee stretches to pick it up and drop it in. Kara laughs again. “See you ‘round, Apollo.”
***
Lee doesn’t see Starbuck for three days. He thinks he hears her a couple times at group meetings or glimpses her passing through crowds, but even then he’s not sure. While he looks for her, he turns the mystery of her over in his mind: what does she do if she doesn’t go to school? Why is she here if she doesn’t believe the protest will work? He tries to keep his mind on the facts, but what he really wants to know is if she’d let him get close to her, know her, touch her. Those fantasies ran rampant while he looks for her, too.
On the third day, even though he’s worried he’ll miss her, Lee heads downtown to his grandfather’s office. Joseph is the only one in his family who takes him seriously, and Lee promised he’d stop by. And of course that’s when he finds her.
Starbuck’s sitting cross-legged on the steps in front of the Caprica City Courthouse, a guitar nestled in her lap. Lee stops in his tracks, lost in the sight of her: her eyes are half-closed as she gives in to the music; her fingers are sliding and stroking deftly over the strings. He recognizes the rise and fall of notes, the minor chords thrilling closer and closer to release until finally they resolve with a rush of joy.
Someone jostles him in passing, leaning in to toss a few cubits into a bowl in front of Starbuck. She looks up at the clinking sound, nods to the donor, then freezes at the sight of Lee. Her fingers keep playing but she’s slipping off the rhythm. After a minute she slaps her hand flat over the strings.
They stare at each other.
“Isn’t that Nomion? Where did you learn to play like that?” he asks in a rush.
Her face goes blank.
“I didn’t mean--” Lee stammers. “Anything. Just that you’re really good.”
Starbuck drops her eyes. “My dad was a musician,” she says tightly.
Lee hesitantly moves toward her, sitting down beside her on the marble steps. “You’re really, really amazing at that,” he says softly. She smiles, a private little smile that makes his heart race with success.
“Thanks,” she mutters.
Suddenly animated, Lee gestures toward the courthouse behind them. “Have you ever been inside? My grandfather took me once and--” He breaks off as her smile vanishes.
She turns to him, opening her mouth and then closing it again. Then she shrugs. “Yeah, I’ve been in there. They had some hearings for my mom. Custody stuff.”
Starbuck is trying to sound nonchalant, but her eyes beg him not to make anything of it, so he doesn’t. Just nods and offers, “No one ever calls my mother on it.” She smiles again, and it’s tense and her eyes are still dark, but he’ll take it. “Is this what you do everyday?” Lee asks.
She shrugs. “Here or somewhere else. Everybody’s back in their offices now from lunch, though; it’ll be dead for a few hours.”
“Can I walk you back to the camp?” Lee asks.
Her eyes dance with amusement, as if she’s about to tease him, but then she answers: “Sure.”
Lee stands, holding out a hand.
She takes it, lets him pull her to her feet.
Their eyes catch, and Lee shivers as tension builds between them. He doesn’t have words for what this is, but he doesn’t ever want to let go of her hand.
“I’m Kara,” Starbuck says quickly.
He nods. “I’m Lee.”
They finally separate.
“I already knew your name,” Kara points out, grinning. She puts her guitar reverently in its case, then shoves the handful of cubits she’s earned into her pocket and packs the bowl away.
“Well, it’s nice to meet you,” he says softly.
They walk back without talking, but every so often Lee glances over at Kara and catches her looking at him.
As they near the camp, he sees her shift, her posture tighter, her smile closer to a smirk. She winks at him as she heads off toward her own part of the camp, back in character. Lee tries not to feel lost without her by his side.
II
The world around him seems different. There’s an energy in him, something new. Lee’s vibrating with it for the rest of the day, and when they gather that evening, he heads confidently for the podium.
“Hi, everyone,” he says into the megaphone. The crowd rumbles back in greeting. “I just--I want to say something that isn’t about bathrooms or who cooks what or when the park is going to kick us all out.” The group quiets, listening. Lee grins. “I want to say that we’re all here to do something remarkable, to change Caprica itself!” They’re loud then, cheering, and the rush he’s felt all day intensifies.
“There’s a lot that’s been going wrong in our society for a long time, but we’re all here to change that!” They’re yelling, some on their feet. He searches her out. “Tomorrow, we need to march to the capitol and not leave until we’re heard!” Just as everyone starts to chant, he sees her.
Kara’s standing stock still in the middle of the mass of people, her hands in fists at her sides. His stomach drops in an instant. He’s done something wrong.
She shakes her head in disgust and slips through the crowd. The two men beside her glance in surprise between her and Lee, then follow her out.
Lee stands on stage, bewildered, as the rest of the room comes together for once, shouting out suggestions. He hands the megaphone to the next person in line and heads after Kara. It’s dim when he gets out of the tent, and he takes a few running steps after her.
“What do you want, Lee?” she asks when he reaches her, her tone surly.
He shakes his head, frantic with confusion. “What happened, Kara?”
She steps closer, her eyes bright with rage. “You come in here and you act like there’s... hope. Like there’s a bright, shiny future waiting for everyone if we can just all cheer at the same time! And you know what, Lee? There’s not. You really think Caprica will listen to us? Teenagers and the unemployed and the homeless? Not in a million years. You can go back to college when this is all done and forget about us, but we will all still be right here.” Kara stops, panting from the force of what she’s said.
She’s right. And she’s gorgeous when she’s like this. So he kisses her. Leans in and cups her face in his hands and kisses her until she’s grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and dragging his body against hers.
The thought flickers through his mind that he could go without breathing if instead he gets this: the taste of Kara’s mouth, the eagerness of her lips and hands and hips. When they finally stop to gasp for air, Lee smiles against her cheek. She jerks back, worry in her face suddenly. Fear.
“I have to go,” Kara says quickly.
He blinks in confusion. “Where?” Lee asks after a beat.
“I have to,” she says, and pushes past him, taking a few running steps and disappearing into the night.
***
Lee forces himself to let her go, to wait for her to come back, and by the next morning he’s busy getting the march underway. There are signs to make and people to organize, and the University wasn’t a fluke--he’s good at this. They head for the capitol, nearly five hundred strong, with more people arriving all the time.
Downtown there’s no one to meet with, no one for them to make demands of or chant at for change, but the crowd doesn’t seem to care. They parade and cheer and Lee rides the wave of their excitement. He doesn’t see Kara, but he didn’t really expect her to come.
It’s all going well until the police forces show up, start to circle them off and slowly close in. Suddenly there’s a lot of shouting about permits and permission and public grounds and the police are looking angrier and angrier. Just as the first tasers come out, everyone starts to run. In the chaos Lee loses everyone else he knows, just bolts for the camp. All he can hear is his heart pounding.
***
They regroup there after an hour or so. Lee can see the fear on Louis and Felix’s faces, and he can hardly believe what he started. He doesn’t know what he’s doing.
Kara was right.
He’s not sure how to fix it, but he wants to kiss her again. He wants to see her grin, to give her all the bright shiny things she thinks she can’t have, whether protests are ever going to work or not. When things have settled down enough and they head for dinner, Lee’s looking around everywhere for Kara, already planning out how to apologize.
“What’s going on?” Louis asks after the third time Lee looks over his shoulder.
Lee tries to shrug. “Just looking for someone.”
Felix grins. “Anyone I know?”
He nods, smiling sheepishly. “Starbuck?”
The other two exchange a glance. “Isn’t she...?” Louis says.
“Mm.” Felix looks back at Lee.
“Isn’t she what?” he demands, brow darkening.
Louis shrugs. “She’s with those two guys. I mean, they’re poly...but that’s cool, if you’re okay with that.”
Lee freezes. Frak. All he’s done is kiss her once and already he’s fiercely jealous at the thought of someone else touching her. “She didn’t mention it.”
Felix looks at him warily. “Well, maybe they’re just friends.”
He snorts. “Maybe.” He waves them on toward dinner and heads toward the Aurora monument near Kara’s tent.
“Apollo!” someone suddenly shouts. “Hey, Apollo!”
Lee turns and finds one of Kara’s friends looming over him. He swallows hard. The other man has at least six inches on him.
“Hey, back off, Sam!” her other friend says quickly, jerking him back by his shoulder.
“What did you say to her?” Sam demands. “Where did she go?”
Lee’s expression shifts to alarm as he realizes what Sam means. “She’s gone? I haven’t seen her since last night--”
Both of them seem to deflate.
“Frak,” Sam curses under his breath, then looks at Lee. “Sorry for...” Sam waves. “Sorry.”
“I was going to look for her. Maybe she just went to play somewhere?” Lee offers.
The second man sighs. “She left her guitar.” He looks at Sam, face serious. “She can take care of herself, though. She’s tough.” He looks at Lee, holds out his hand. “Helo.”
Lee introduces himself, shakes Helo’s hand gratefully. “Where would Kara go?” he asks, frowning.
They both turn to him in surprise, and Sam starts to grin.
***
Kara stumbles back into camp, exhausted and hungover, as the sky deepens toward full dark. She heads toward dinner and collapses onto a bench across from Helo and Sam.
“Have a nice ramble?” Sam jokes.
She tries to roll her eyes but it hurts.
“Here.” Helo pushes his water across the table to her and she drinks it eagerly. As she starts to feel more human, she raises an eyebrow at the two of them.
“You’re not pissed at me.”
“Well, we were,” Sam starts, grinning. “And then we talked to someone very interesting.”
She rests her chin on her folded arms. “Uh-huh.”
“You’ll never guess what that Apollo kid wanted to know.”
Kara’s stomach sinks. “What?”
“He wanted to know where Kara had run off to.” Sam’s eyes are dancing.
Kara sits up straight, bracing herself.
“You told him your name,” Helo says, shaking his head in awe.
“She told him her name,” Sam agrees earnestly.
“Yeah, yeah,” Kara mutters.
“Oh, no,” Helo says, “this is a big deal. Miss Kara Thrace, who had more aliases in the system than anyone I’ve ever met, told a boy she barely knows her real name.”
“I think maybe these kids are in love,” Sam adds, teasing. “He even asked if I’m Kara’s boyfriend, or whatever.”
Kara huffs. “Just shut up, both of you. Right frakking now.” They laugh as they tuck into their food. Then she looks up sharply as she realizes what he said. “What did you tell him?”
Sam pauses, his eyes growing serious. “I told him we’re family.”
She sighs softly, looking back at him, then nods. “Okay.”
“So why’d you run away from him?” Helo asks after a few minutes have passed.
She shakes her head. “He kissed me.”
“Yeah.” Helo sighs, and they eat in silence.
Kara closes her eyes, starts to doze. It’s something only these two have ever really understood: people either leave or stay. There’s no use letting the ones who’ll leave you break your heart.
***
It’s too loud in the camp, so Kara takes Helo’s water bottle and heads to the edge, sitting on the boundary wall where she first saw Lee. For a long time she watches the cars pass by, trying to block out everything else.
“Hey,” he says softly behind her, laying a hand on her shoulder.
She can’t deny the way her stomach flips when he touches her, the slow burn it ignites. “Hey,”
she answers.
Lee throws a leg over the wall, settles beside her. “We went the capitol,” he says after a minute.
“I heard.”
“It didn’t do any good.” He sighs, and Kara can hear the disappointment in his voice.
“You really believe that stuff,” she says, and even though she knows it’s hopeless, she finds it a little endearing. “You think you can change things.”
Lee meets her eyes, his face intent. A passing car illuminates him briefly and she’s struck by his beauty. “Don’t you?” he asks. “Somebody has to. I mean, why else are you here?”
Kara recoils, stares into the night. “We needed somewhere to sleep.”
She jumps off the wall and heads into the park, unable to look him in the eye. But he follows her and she’s glad. They wander past the tents and up a hill. The sounds of the road are distant here and the stars are bright, at least for the city. Kara drops down to the grass.
Lee stands over her, blocking the stars out.
“Well?” Kara finally says lightly.
“Okay.” He sits beside her.
Their shoulders just barely touch, but she can feel the heat of his body. Kara points, pressing more firmly into him. “There’s Persephone,” she says. “See the cluster of pomegranate seeds?”
“Yeah,” Lee says uncertainly.
“Do you know the story? Hades took her to the underworld to be his wife, and her mother mourned. Eventually she got her back, but because of the seeds, Persephone was never free.” Kara lays back, tracing the constellation with her eyes.
Lee looks down at her. “I don’t know that one.”
Kara shrugs, the grass tickling her neck. “For a while I lived in a foster home with a poly, religious family. One of the moms liked to read us myths. I always liked that one, it was like me, going back and forth between the safe place and hell.”
“Foster care was that bad?” He sounds worried.
Kara doesn’t answer. Instead, she reaches for his hand, weaves her fingers through his. She feels the same snap of connection from yesterday, hears Lee’s breath catch. A shiver of anticipation runs through her. “What’s your favorite?” she asks, nodding up at the stars.
He eases down beside her. “Don’t laugh,” he says.
Kara giggles. “Too late.”
Lee points. “Baucis and Philemon. See the two arcs, meeting just there. My parents never really... I just like the idea of forever...” When she doesn’t answer, he turns.
Kara looks at him, fighting the urge to--she’s not sure. Cry, maybe. She raises up on an elbow, leaning over him, and does the only thing she can: she kisses him.
For a moment it’s slow and soft, but then Lee tugs her closer and they’re lying together, her breasts pressed into his chest, and their kisses grow urgent. Kara moans as Lee rolls them over, his weight pinning her down, and he presses his lips down the side of her throat. For just a moment she gives herself completely to the sensation of him, lets go.
Then sirens explode around them, lights and megaphones and dogs barking and Kara’s on her feet and running, as fast as she can, before she’s even had time to think.
Lee is right behind her as they reach the boundary wall and vault over it, and they’re across the street and into the city. It’s only blocks later, stumbling to a halt, that Kara realizes she’s lost him.
***
The arrest is a shock of chaos that seems to play out in silence, officers mouthing words Lee can’t hear over the sirens as they shove him into the back of a car. Most of the protesters seem to be cordoned off but not in custody, though here and there another breaks free of the group and gets dragged off. Before the scene has finished playing out, the car Lee’s in takes off, siren wailing over his head.
He can still feel the softness of her lips, but as he stares out into the night, Lee wonders if he’ll ever see Kara again.
III
Lee sits on the floor of the holding cell, leaning against the wall, head in his hands. He hasn’t been charged with anything--even the police don’t seem exactly sure what they’d charge him with. The others in the cell seem far less concerned with their futures: a drunk man is snoring on the one cot, and a couple of women, possibly prostitutes, have taken the bench. Lee’s not sure where the other protesters have been taken.
He can’t imagine what his father’s going to say.
The door at the end of the hall opens. Lee hears the jingling of keys and the heavy scuff of an officer’s boots.
“You’re going to uncuff me, right?” a girl’s voice asks impetuously, and Lee’s head pops up.
Kara smirks as she struts down the corridor in front of the guard, then gives him a wink as she’s nudged inside inside the cell. The man reaches through the bars to take off her cuffs, and Kara rubs her wrists, arms swinging free. Lee can’t quite figure out what’s happening, but he’s grinning like an idiot.
She heads toward him as the guard leaves, a hint of self-consciousness in her smile. She shrugs, standing over him.
Lee shakes his head, then peers closely at her and realizes there’s a darkening bruise on her cheekbone. “What the hell happened?” he demands.
Kara shrugs. “Kicked a cop car. Couldn’t leave you alone in here. They’ll let us out in the morning, and I figured it’s warmer than a tent for the night.” She drops and sits at his side.
He wants to protest, to tell her she shouldn’t have, to get angry at the cops... but all he can think is that she came for him. She’s here at his side. Lee slowly takes her hand, and Kara smiles, squeezing back.
“They should let us out in the morning,” she repeats softly, bravado fading from her tone. “There might be fines.”
“You’ve done this before?” he asks. He’d thought she was joking with Zak.
Kara avoids his eyes. “Yeah. I got picked up for shoplifting a couple times. And once for attacking one of the other foster kids, but that was his fault.”
Lee nods. “I haven’t.”
She laughs. “No, of course not.”
“Kara.”
She looks at him shyly as he invokes her name.
“Thanks.”
She nods, presses a kiss to his cheek, and shifts, resting her head on his shoulder. “So Lee,” she says after a minute, “since we’ve got all night... tell me your story.”
So he does. For more than an hour he tells her about his father’s occasional presence in his life, his mother’s drinking habits, his brother’s hero-worship. About the pressure to go to War College instead of Apollo University, and how his father is still reminding him it’s not too late to transfer and get his wings. About how he follows the rules, all the time, trying to keep things going smoothly, but he’s not sure he really believes in any of it at all. Lee’s never said any of this out loud before; some of it he’s never even articulated to himself. But as he finishes, he feels calmer. Kara’s fingers are still woven through his own, and he knows she’s not going anywhere.
“What about you?” Lee finally asks, and feels Kara stiffen at the question. He tugs at her hand until she looks at him. “You can trust me.”
She nods, and holds on tight for a moment before she starts. He’s gotten hints of this before, but it’s worse than he ever imagined. Her mother driving her father out, abusing young Kara but denying it just convincingly enough for Family Services to return her daughter to her care over and over again. Kara paints it for him with broad strokes, but the way she hides her free hand in her lap tells the rest of the story.
The parts that aren’t about her mother, Kara tells with greater ease. She smiles as she describes meeting Helo, another child of the system, and finding him over and over in different foster placements. Next came Sam when they were nearly fifteen, suddenly orphaned when his parents died in a freak accident. There’s a kind of awe in Kara’s voice when she describes the three of them together, sharing an attic bedroom in the home of a poly family that genuinely cared about them, the first time she ever really felt loved. Lee begins to understand what Sam meant when he said they were family. She describes their closeness, alludes to their sexual explorations, and even as he tenses with jealousy, Lee can see it, can’t help understanding.
“Then we turned eighteen,” Kara says tightly, “all three of us within a few months. We were with a hard family then, and we each took the hundred cubits and left.” She shrugs. “Together it was enough to buy a tent, and some food. I still had my dad’s guitar. We’ve survived.”
Lee shakes his head. He can’t even imagine not having his family to rely on, screwed up as it is. “What about your mom?” he asks hesitantly.
She doesn’t answer, and when he glances over, Kara’s staring at her knees. “I went,” she whispers. “This morning.” Her face is closed off, but Lee can see the horror of it in her eyes. “She has cancer. I tried to--to talk to her about it, but she started screaming, about how I left her just like my dad.” Kara closes her eyes. “Then she started throwing things, so I left.”
Lee traces the bruise on her cheek, his shoulders tight with fury. It was dusk already when he saw her earlier, and he can’t help wondering. He can’t stand that he’s wondering.
Kara shakes her head, pulling away from his touch.
He lets go of her hand so he can wrap his arms around her shoulders, pulling her closer against him. He can feel her breath against his throat, and aches with how terribly he wants to protect her. Kara nestles closer, and Lee tightens his embrace. They sit that way for a long time.
Eventually they fall asleep.
***
The door to the main part of the police station clangs open loudly, and Kara jerks upright. Lee’s arm is still around her, and he squeezes her shoulder as she yawns.
“Adama,” the guard says, flattening out the vowels. Kara looks up sharply, focused on the older man beside him with faded Tauron tattoos. She’d bet he’s the grandfather Lee described just a few hours ago.
“Your mother is furious,” Joseph says, looking down at them.
Lee shrugs, then glances at Kara. “Can you get her out, too?”
Joseph meets her eyes, and Kara tries not to flinch. She’s not sure what he’s looking for, but after a moment, he nods. “I’ll see what I can do.”
They rise together and follow the officer. He returns her switchblade and cigarette lighter as she shifts uncomfortably under Joseph’s eyes.
“Thank you,” Kara says sincerely as they head out of the building, everything finally resolved. Lee’s grandfather’s legal knowledge and quick talking has gotten them both off with warnings instead of fines. Kara will have to burn the alias she gave, but that’s it.
“Don’t worry about it.” For the first time since he arrived, Joseph smiles. “Now come on, Evelyn will want to fuss over the two of you.”
Kara freezes, halfway down the marble steps to the street. “I really shouldn’t--I’ll be fine back at--”
“Absolutely not,” Joseph’s voice gets just a touch harder. “You could both use a hot meal and some real sleep.” He turns toward Lee. “I’m hardly sending you back to Carolanne for that. No, come on, I’m parked over here.”
Kara looks to Lee and he nods, reaching for her hand again. Against her better judgment, she takes it.
***
The Adamas’ home is in one of the stately uptown neighborhoods. As Joseph leads Lee and Kara inside, she looks around nervously. Nothing here is gaudy; everything is elegant. Joseph sets his keys in a low porcelain bowl and nods up the stairs. “Why don’t you two get settled in the guest room? Evelyn’s not up yet and I’m sure you could use some sleep.”
They do as he says. Kara relaxes slightly when she’s alone with Lee. He keeps touching her, taking her hand or running his fingers down her back, and she’s both comforted by it and more and more tantalized, her whole body snapping to attention at the merest touch.
“I think I’ll shower,” Lee mutters, letting go of her abruptly as they make it into the guest room. He glances at her nervously and Kara hides a grin at his reaction to being alone with her and a bed.
“Okay,” she says, and lies back to wait.
The quilt beneath her is incredibly comfortable, and Kara runs her fingers over it lightly. To have something like this just for guests! It’s almost inconceivable. As she hears the shower start, Kara slips out into the hallway, exploring the pictures that run down the stairs. She sees Lee with his mother and father--it’s picturesque in spite of all the hidden drama. On the landing is a larger photo from his graduation the year before. Lee’s holding his diploma, grinning proudly. Zak is wearing an ApolloU sweatshirt, showing off his brother’s accomplishment.
Kara grits her teeth at the reminder: no matter what he says, Lee has a future waiting for him. And not one that involves a homeless street musician with more scars than she can count. Aching, Kara eases down the rest of the stairs.
“Going somewhere?” Joseph asks softly.
She whirls, stammers. “My friends will be worried about me--the police--”
Joseph nods, cutting her off. “Come have a cup of tea,” he says firmly.
Kara slowly follows him into the kitchen.
Lee’s grandfather sets on the water and takes out mugs. The kitchen is surprisingly unautomated--most older people Kara’s seen still try to cling to the old conveniences. But there are cabinets here instead of dispensers, and a broom in the corner instead of a robovac.
As Joseph sets her tea on the counter, he nods to the small tattoo inside Kara’s wrist: a little black triangle. “Have you given a son away in marriage?” he asks, his eyes teasing.
She shrugs. “My friends and I made them up. We’re not Tauron, we just liked the idea. Bonding yourself to other people...” Her voice trails off as he nods.
“I looked you up, Kara,” Joseph says softly.
She freezes, staring at him, ready to bolt.
“The police may not have run it, but they took a DNA sample from you back there, and there’s a fair amount of information about you in the system.”
Kara swallows hard. She can’t believe he didn’t just let her leave when he had the chance.
Joseph sips his tea slowly. “I don’t come to this lifestyle by birth,” he says then. He waits for Kara to meet his eyes. “My brother and I lost our parents early, and did what we had to, to stay alive. The system on Tauron has even less to say for it than Caprica’s.”
Kara nods, her fear easing slightly.
“As long as you’re a guest of Lee’s, you’re welcome in my home.” Joseph glances up as the sound of running water from the upstairs bathroom cuts off.
She stares into her tea, overwhelmed by sudden emotion. “Thank you,” Kara whispers.
Joseph nods. “Go on. I expect he’ll be looking for you.”
Kara smiles, and heads upstairs. In the bedroom Lee is dressed in sweats, his eyes dark with exhaustion. He tosses an extra pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt to her. Kara grabs them and heads into the bathroom. When she comes out again, Lee is under the covers, fast asleep. Kara looks down at him fondly, then draws the curtains against the early morning light and slides into bed beside him.
***
Lee wakes up warm and well-rested for the first time in a week. He stretches, yawning, and his fingers brush something soft. His eyes open: it’s Kara’s hair. And there she is, staring back with a smile. His chest swells at the sight of her.
“Hey,” Kara says quietly.
“Good morning,” he answers, grinning.
She glances toward the windows and wrinkles her nose. “I’m pretty sure it’s afternoon by now, Apollo.”
He glares at her use of the nickname and reaches out, tickling her until she’s squirming and laughing. His hands still, wrapped around her ribs where her t-shirt has ridden up. Lee meets her eyes uncertainly, not sure how far Kara wants to take this. Her eyes are dark as her tongue flicks out, wetting her lips, and she’s certainly not protesting now. Lee dips his head, pressing his lips against her.
Kara sighs as their mouths open and the kiss deepens. The heat between them grows steadily, and they press eagerly toward one another. Lee’s hand slides up, cupping Kara’s breast as she arches into his touch. Lee drops his head to tease her with his tongue and she grabs at his hair and frak, he wants her.
“Is this okay?” Lee asks as he reaches for the edge of Kara’s pants, pulling back for a moment. He’s been with his share of college girls, and a couple of girlfriends in high school, but whatever this is with Kara is something else entirely.
“Don’t you dare stop,” she begs, her hands on his shoulders pulling him back to her. “Just get a condom.”
Lee nods, slipping out of bed and reaching for his jeans. He’s just glad the police didn’t bother to confiscate these; he can’t imagine his grandfather seeing them in the rest of his possessions. He tears one off and heads back to bed.
Kara’s stripped off her t-shirt and sweatpants, and is lying spread before him. As Lee stares down at her hungrily, she sits up and swings her legs over the side of the bed, reaching for the condom.
He’s impossibly hard as she shoves down his pants. Kara’s fist closes around his cock and Lee groans, struggling to keep control of himself. She strokes him hard and fast. Lee grabs her wrist, meets her teasing eyes. Kara pulls away and rips open the packet, slides the condom onto him, then moves backward on the bed so he can position himself over her.
“Come on, Lee,” Kara whispers.
He nods and holds her eyes as he strokes his fingers through the wet heat between her legs. Kara’s whole body jerks at the sensation and he grins, then aligns their bodies and slowly thrusts into her. He can’t even contain how good it feels. Then she whimpers and he’s moving, surging into her over and over as Kara wraps her legs around him and urges him on.
She’s louder than he expected and Lee kisses Kara deep as she starts to thrash beneath him, swallowing her cries. Her body tightens around him as orgasm washes through her, and the sensation is so intense Lee follows her into pleasure with a few final thrusts.
Lee rolls to the side, holding Kara against him. He’s never felt like this before.
As they lie together, catching their breath, Kara seems to have caught his hesitance from earlier. After a few minutes, she sits up, sliding off the bed. “We should probably get back to the camp,” she says, her voice faintly hoarse.
“Yeah,” he says, content to look at her as she moves around collecting her clothes.
“I’m just going to shower. While we’re here.”
Lee nods. “Go ahead.” She goes into the bathroom and he hears the water start. As he lays in bed, body limp with pleasure, Lee grins. He finally knows what he wants.
IV
Kara slinks into the camp, speeding her pace slightly so Lee falls a step behind her. She’s halfway back to her tent when Helo appears, his face raw with relief, and wraps her in his arms.
“Frak, Starbuck, we thought they’d got you,” he says as he hugs her close.
She shrugs as he lets her go. “They did, but just for a minute.”
Helo nods in worry, then his eyes twinkle as he sees Lee behind her. “They got both of you?”
Kara glares. “Shut up.”
“Well I’ll go tell Sam you’re alive,” Helo mutters, and nods to Lee as he heads off.
She blushes as she turns to face Lee, her hands on her hips. He stares back at her, grinning with adoration, and a little rush of pleasure runs through her. Lee wants her, and the rest of it doesn’t matter. Kara steps closer, leans up to give him a quick kiss.
“So...do you want to share my tent with me?” Lee asks nervously.
Kara giggles.
He rolls his eyes. “I just mean--” He shakes his head. “I want you to, is all.”
She swallows hard. She feels like she’s flying, or maybe falling. “For tonight,” is all she says.
***
Lee’s not sure how he got this lucky. As the next few days pass, Kara is never far from his side. They don’t talk about it again, but she spend every night in his tent. No matter how Louis and Felix glare at them in the morning, Lee delights in being with her, is drunk on the pleasure of Kara’s body and the way she makes him feel. As long as he’s with her it couldn’t matter less that he’s not sure what he’s doing or whether he can really change the world.
They seem to be settling into their relationship when he makes the mistake of calling it one.
“This is just a fling, Lee,” Kara snaps. They’re wandering the park, searching out a moment of privacy, and Lee stops short, chilled by her words.
“How can you say that?” he demands. “After all that we’ve...”
Kara shakes her head, her eyes vulnerable. “How much longer do you have here? A week? Then it’s back to school for Apollo.” She holds his gaze, challenging him. “That was always your plan.”
Lee feels like he can’t breathe. “Well, you can come, too! There’s plenty of room in my apartment, and you can start taking classes, you’re smart for frak’s sake, Kara, and--”
“No.” She steps further away from him, and the night grows cold.
Lee’s eyes harden. “What are you going to do here? Keep camping out forever? Even when you don’t think it’ll change anything?”
Kara whirls, striding away, her hands clenched tight. “This is my life, Lee.”
He heads after her, catching her shoulder. “You can change it, Kara! Maybe you can’t change the world, but you can change this. And I’ll help you. That’s what being in a relationship means.”
“Believe me, Lee,” she answers, tense under his hand, “I don’t need your pity or your help.”
“That wasn’t--”
She takes off, at a run this time, and Lee stares after her, not even sure what he’s done wrong.
***
Kara stumbles out into the city, heads toward the nearest dive bar. She orders an ambrosia, slapping down all the money she earned that day with a mumble to keep it coming.
She’s not sure where she thought it would go. Frak. She should never have stopped running the first time, after he kissed her and the whole world seemed to spin around them. Kara knocks back the first shot of liquor, trying not to cry. If Sam and Helo are all she has, that’s still a lot. She certainly doesn’t need Lee Adama. But no matter how many times she repeats it, it never quite seems true.
Time passes, one long blur of shot glasses, and then Sam settles onto the stool next to her.
“Want me to beat him up?” he asks seriously.
Kara half-laughs, then nearly chokes on her drink. “No,” she says softly. “He’s not worth it.”
“Okay, good,” Sam says, lifting the glass out of her hand and finishing it off. “He seems like a nice enough kid.”
She winces, her shoulders sinking. “He is just a kid,” she nods. “And this is just his vacation.”
Sam rests a hand on the back of her neck, and waves the bartender away. “Let’s go home,” he says softly. “Helo promises to read you a bedtime story if you agree not to kick in your sleep.”
Kara grins, and lets him tug her off of her chair. She sways and Sam catches her. He supports her as they head out into the night, cross the street back toward the park. Kara scuffs her feet along the sidewalk, glancing away toward Lee’s tent, and for a moment a sense of loss hits her again.
“Kara?” Sam asks gently.
She shakes her head. “Nothing.”
***
Lee hovers on her periphery the next day at breakfast, and at the group meeting, spends the next day standing across the street listening to her play. Kara ignores him as hard as she can, trying not to think about what it felt like to sleep in his arms and really trust that she was safe. Gods, she was a fool.
She’s vaguely aware that Helo and Sam are running interference, keeping Lee at a distance whenever he comes past their tent. After the second day she snaps at them to stop, that a week was hardly enough for some college kid to be anything more to her than a quick frak. She’s not sure if they do stop or if they just get better at it, but things seem to go back to normal.
Kara wanders back into the camp the next day, the strap of her guitar case across her chest, when she sees the news vans. She stops short, edging around the crowd.
“What’s going on?” she mutters to one of Lee’s friends.
He turns to her in surprise, then gestures to the cameras. “The Mayor’s thinking about closing park. The Greystones have been complaining that this land was donated and developed by them and the Mayor should kick us all out.”
“And their protests matter more,” Kara snorts.
He shrugs. “Exactly. There’s no news yet on what the Mayor will do, but the media finally seem to care.”
Kara nods and keeps walking. The reporters are everywhere, interviewing everyone. She dodges one who tries to wave a microphone in her face, but as she reaches her own section of the camp she freezes at the sight of Lee, face earnest and open, talking to one of the cameras.
Creeping closer, Kara tries to hear.
“And what is it the protesters want?” the woman interviewing him asks.
Lee opens his mouth, but takes a long moment before answering. “We’re here for a lot of different reasons,” he finally says. “I can only speak for myself.” He looks up then, straight at Kara.
She feels the same bolt of connection she’s always felt with him and quickly closes her eyes. But when she opens them he’s still there.
“There’s a lot that’s wrong with Caprican society,” Lee says, speaking to the camera but also to her. “We don’t take care of each other the way we need to, there’s vast inequality between the people at the top and all the people, many of them children, who are at the bottom. We live in a place where those kids grow up thinking they don’t have a future worth fighting for. And that’s not the way it should be. In the end there’s no future for our world, for any of the worlds, unless things change.” His eyes are bright, his tone insistent. Kara holds her breath, trying to hear every word.
“Do you think that this protest will achieve the kind of world you’re talking about?” the reporter asks skeptically.
Lee meets Kara’s eyes for a moment more, his face shifting from hope to resolve. “No,” he says. “I don’t. There’s energy here, and that’s good, we need energy, but we also need strategy. I don’t have all the words, or all the answers, but my grandfather...he’s a civil rights lawyer. He’s dedicated his whole career to trying to help people and groups of people have the lives they deserve. I think maybe that’s the place to start. And when I get back to University next week, I’m planning to study law.”
Kara sighs, nodding. Even though it hurts, she smiles at him, with something that feels like pride.
Before she has time to step away, the woman with the camera has swung around, is pointing at her. “What’s your name?” she asks brightly.
Kara takes a stumbling step back, but there’s nowhere to go, and Lee’s waiting for her to answer. “Starbuck,” she says, jutting her chin out defiantly.
The woman hardly bats an eye. “What’s brought you to Greystone Park, Starbuck?”
She takes a deep breath. “The system is frakked,” she bites out. “Like Lee said. This whole society is frakked to hell and back. Nothing’s fair about the way the world works.”
“And are you going to be a lawyer, too?” the reporter prompts.
Kara starts to shake her head, then stops. “I’m not sure yet,” she says slowly. “But we have to do something. We have to make it fair.” Beyond the camera Lee breaks out in a grin and Kara tries to hold in the smile threatening to spread across her own face.
“Hey, CapCity News, check this out!” Sam yells, running up behind her and mooning the camera. Kara bursts into giggles as the reporter and her camera man quickly head in the other direction. But when Sam turns to drive Lee away next, Kara grabs his arm and shakes her head.
Sam winks and heads in the other direction.
“You’re going to talk to me, now?” Lee asks. His tone is sharp, but she can hear in his voice that he’s been hurt by her avoiding him.
Kara drops her eyes. “I liked what you said, just now.” She hazards a glance at him. “I think you might be right about some of that.”
Lee leans in closer, tilting his ear toward her. “Could you say that again?”
She grins, laughing as the tension breaks. “In your dreams, Apollo.”
“Yeah?” he grabs her around her waist. “I have been having some dreams...” His lips close over hers, and Kara’s knees go weak as he kisses her surely. She clings to him for a moment, her arms around his neck.
“You have a future,” Lee whispers, pulling back far enough to see her. “You can go to school, or be a musician, or live in a tent for the rest of your life. You just have to believe it.”
She’s not sure if it’s the light of day or the honesty in his eyes or the way his body is driving her to distraction, but in that moment, Kara believes him. She kisses him again, harder.
Helo catcalls. “Get a room.”
Kara stretches out her hand to flip him off without letting go of Lee. She hears Helo laugh.
Lee pulls her tighter against him. “I do have a tent,” he murmurs against her lips, and she nods emphatically, lets him lead her through the swirling crowd.
Kara ducks into his tent and turns, looking up at him. She’s startled to find Lee staring down at her, something like anger in his eyes. “What is it?” she asks, her stomach dropping.
He frowns for a second, then kneels in front of her. “I don’t know what this is, Kara. But I’m not kidding. It’s more than a fling, it’s more than a frak, and I know you haven’t had a lot of people stick by you but you have to stop running away from me.”
She fights the urge to bolt. It helps that he’s blocking the only exit.
Lee reaches out, cupping her cheek, and his touch instantly grounds her. “I kept trying to find you, but I could never think of what I’d say. I don’t...I can’t imagine just walking away from this. I can’t imagine ever finding this again with anyone else.”
It almost hurts, how good it feels to hear him say it. Kara laughs to cover the sob she can feel welling in her chest. “Good,” she bites out, blinking away tears.
He smiles, incandescent. “Good,” Lee whispers.
She presses herself into his arms, kissing him hard. Lee shudders against her, rolling her down into the tangled blankets. His body is heavy on hers; he’s already hard and his hands pull eagerly at her clothing. Kara runs her hands under his shirt, scratching at his back as she bucks against him.
Lee groans and she laughs, pulling at his fly, lifting her hips as he jerks her jeans down. “So good,” she teases, then loses her breath all together as he covers her mouth with his, his hands groping and stroking in all the right places.
Before when he touched her she was counting down in her head: how many fraks were left, how many days until Lee Adama packed his bags and headed back into the world. Kara arches her back as Lee finally slides into her, her legs wrapping around his hips. She’s not counting anymore, not thinking of anything but the power of him inside her, the intimacy of him panting her name in her ear as he comes.
There are no words for it at all.
***
Long past midnight, Kara lies awake in Lee’s arms, stroking her fingers over the muscled planes of his body. He squirms as she finds a new ticklish spot and she grins.
Suddenly the sirens begin again. In the distance bullhorns are announcing something unintelligible. Outside it isn’t the usual raid; there aren’t just cops and dogs. Greystone security forces are approaching, tearing down tents and shoving people into the street.
Lee and Kara scramble into their clothes, and this time as they go over the fence they’re side by side.
Half a mile later, they finally slow to a walk. Lee reaches out his hand, and Kara takes it. Ahead of them, visible between the rows of skyscrapers, is the capitol. The world around them is silent, the night air cool and still.
“So what do we do now?” Lee asks, glancing over his shoulder at the police lights in the distance.
Kara stops, gazing up the marble steps. She squeezes his hand, feels the rush of connection. The light in his eyes says he feels it, too. She grins. “Fight ‘em til we can’t.”
Author:
embolaliaSummary: Lee Adama heads home for spring break to join the Occupy CapCity protest and finds himself questioning everything.
Characters: Kara/Lee, Sam, Helo, Gaeta, Hoshi, Zak
Rating: R
Warnings: mentions of past child abuse
Beta Thanks: ALL the thanks to
wicked_sassy for her help!Author Notes: Written for
workerbee73 for the song prompt “Box Full of Letters” and the lyrics I wish I had a lotta answers/'Cause that's the way it should be/All these questions/Being directed at me... Also for the comment that you don’t mind AUsI
Lee slams the door as he gets out of the car, twenty minutes of angry silence expressed in the gesture. His mother takes off with a screech. He shakes his head in frustration and drops his tent, swinging his pack onto his back.
As he turns toward the camp, he catches a girl watching him. She’s perched on the stone wall that runs the perimeter of the dozen city blocks that make up Greystone Park, and she’s looking at him like she saw everything that just happened.
He flinches under her gaze. When he meets her eyes, she offers a lopsided smile. He feels his heart start to pound. For a moment Lee thinks he must know her.
“Hey, Adama!”
Lee turns at the sound of Felix’s voice, then drops his pack as his friend runs up to hug him. When he turns back, the girl is gone.
“You’re finally here!” Felix continues. “Come on, we’ve already staked out some ground.” He grabs Lee’s tent and starts leading the way into the Occupy CapCity encampment, explaining who else from their high school class has joined the movement while they’re home for spring break. Lee half-listens, trying to take everything in, trying to catch sight of her again.
He’s been to Greystone Park before of course, it’s hard to walk around downtown Caprica City without going past it or through it, but everything looks different now. The obelisk monuments have been co-opted as tent poles and the others have signs and artwork draped over them proclaiming the myriad political statements of the camp’s hordes.
Mess tents and portable toilets are scattered throughout the camp, their combined smells overpowering as Lee and Felix pass too close. The park seems to be crammed with people, old and young, speaking every language of the twelve colonies. It’s nothing like the smaller site the students at his college have created. Compared to theirs, this is huge. Lee cracks a smile, riding the energy of the people around him. They might actually get something accomplished.
“And here we are,” Felix proclaims, setting Lee’s tent down in a narrow patch of bare ground. “Louis and I have ours set up just there,” he points. “This whole area is mostly college kids.”
“Thanks,” Lee nods, setting his bag down and starting to unwrap his tent. “It’ll be good to see everyone.” He grins at Felix. It will, too. He hasn’t talked to most of their friends since he headed off to University in the fall, and there’s something comforting about being around people who know him again.
“Anyway, I’ll let you unpack. The daily meeting is at seven and it’s already past six.”
“Sounds good.” Lee glances around again as his friend leaves. Maybe she’ll be there.
***
Halfway through the meeting, Lee feels shell-shocked. On campus, there was an order to things. Someone made a point, someone rebutted, everybody voted. Here there’s total chaos.
Felix has been trying to get the group to vote on designating bathroom cleaning crews for more than half an hour, and people won’t stop asking unrelated questions and dragging the group off task. Every so often, someone starts ranting about the police forces and their right to be there and the group breaks into frantic cheering for a few minutes until someone else manages to restore order.
“This is ridiculous,” he mutters. “Is this really what we’re all here for?”
“Well go and say something,” Louis offers. “Isn’t that what we’re all here for?”
Lee nods nervously, then stands up, waiting at the edge of the podium and turning the question over in his mind. What are they there for? Because tuition is outrageous and the head of Greystone Industries makes in a day what his father makes in a year in the military. Because the school system is crap and he’s heard stories about rampant religious intolerance on Gemenon and starving children on Tauron. Because...
Felix gestures at him, urging him onto the small platform. “Go ahead,” he hisses, handing Lee the megaphone.
“Hi,” Lee says, staring out across the crowd, uncertain what it is he wants to say. “I’m Lee. And I just--I just wanted to tell you that...we need to just clean up the bathrooms and move on. There are more important things to talk about...”
“Frak yeah, spring break!” a girl’s voice interrupts.
Lee’s eyes snap up to find the blond girl he saw earlier. Laughter washes through the crowd as he doesn’t answer. She’s grinning at him, her expression a flagrant dare. “We have to bring justice to the Twelve Colonies!” he finally stammers into the megaphone, but no one’s listening. Felix takes it from him gently, without making eye contact.
“Don’t worry about it,” he mutters.
Lee slips back to his seat, his cheeks burning. On campus, surrounded by other college students, everyone listens when he speaks. He’s been a leader of Occupy ApolloU since it got started.
“For what it’s worth, you were right,” Louis says.
He shrugs. “Yeah...”
“That girl, Starbuck--she just disrupts everything.”
“Starbuck?” Lee asks quickly.
Louis tries to hide a grin. “She kind of...heckles. I think she might come drunk.”
Lee twists around, trying to see if she’s still there. If she is, she’s changed seats. “Excuse me,” he mutters, and climbs over Louis’ legs. “I’ll be back.” Before the other man can protest, he slips out of the meeting tent.
He steps outside and there, as if he’s conjured her up, is Starbuck. Her back is to him, her head tilted up to look at the stars coming out. Smoke wafts from a cigarette hanging precariously from her fingers.
“Yeah?” she drawls after a minute.
Lee lets out half a laugh at being caught. Then she turns and he can’t seem to breathe, let alone laugh.
“Well?” her eyes are bright and teasing. She’s absolutely beautiful.
“Do you really disagree with me?” he asks intensely. “Don’t you think we should be working together here?”
For just a moment Starbuck’s face is open, her eyes searching his. “I don’t think a bunch of college kids in tents are going to change the system much, if that’s what you’re asking,” she bites out. Her eyes drop to his chest and Lee is uncomfortably aware that APOLLO is blazed across his sweatshirt in gold letters.
Lee tilts his head. “Where do you go to school?”
She snorts. “I don’t.”
He looks closer at her: she’s definitely no older than he is. He’s not sure quite what to make of her answer, but he holds out his hand. “I’m Lee Adama.”
“Starbuck!” a voice calls from the main entrance to the meeting space. She twists to look over her shoulder, and Lee sees two tall young men waving her over. She grins.
“I’m Starbuck,” she says, grinning, and turns away, leaving him standing there with his hand stuck out. Lee watches one of them sling an arm around her shoulders, grabbing her cigarette and taking a long inhale. The other musses her hair and leans in to say something. All of them laugh; the sound rings out in the quiet of the evening.
Lee shakes his head in awe as he heads back inside. Someone at the front is ranting about the dark side of Colonialism, but he barely hears it. She talked to him.
***
Kara wakes up with someone’s elbow in her ribs. She shoves it away and sits up. Sam’s rolled in his sleeping bag overnight, ending up half on top of her. Helo is awake on her other side, propped up on one elbow, reading a book.
“Morning,” he says softly when he sees she’s awake.
She slides back into her cocoon of blankets, resting her head on her arms. “Yup.”
“Want to hear?”
Kara nods.
He reads aloud, something about detectives and murderers and the streets of Delphi. It’s a different book than yesterday; that was about the beaches of Triton and a love scene that made his ears burn. Kara curls into the sound of his voice, relaxing as she listens. She met Helo in foster care when they were both twelve. He had two black eyes; she had ten broken fingers. But where she was angry at the world, he was calm. He’d sit sometimes with the youngest kids, the three- and four-year-olds, telling them stories or reading picture books. Kara smiles at the memory.
“What?” Sam asks suddenly, sitting bolt upright behind her.
Kara turns, giggling at him. “Dreaming?”
He snorts, shakes it off. “I guess.”
She grins. “Okay, boys. I need to pee, then we can talk about Sam’s need to sleep on top of me.” Climbing over their legs as they protest, she pulls on her jeans, then unzips the tent flap and steps, blinking, into bright sunlight.
***
Kara takes her breakfast to the picnic tables while Helo and Sam head to the church down the street to sneak in and shower. She’s halfway through a packaged pastry when a kid wanders up, his designer jeans and pristine backpack marking him as either a newcomer or lost. But his eyes are excited and he’s clearly harmless. Kara grins ferally.
“Can I sit?” he asks, pointing to the other bench. “I’m just waiting for my brother.”
“Go for it, kid,” she says with false enthusiasm.
“I’m Zak,” he says.
“Mm.” Kara keeps eating, watching him patiently.
“Have you been here long? My mom’s all worried about my brother, that it’ll be too cold or he’ll get in trouble with the cops or something. I had to take the train just cause she wouldn’t come down here again, you know?”
Kara nods through his rambling. “Well,” she says, leaning in a little. “I’ve been here for four months. And it’s true, the cops come through. Usually at night. This one time they brought their dogs - you’ve seen them?” she lowers her voice as his eyes go wide. “One of them bit clean through my jeans, I just barely got away.”
Zak looks both terrified and completely in love. “Holy frak!”
She grins. “And another time--”
“Zak? How’d you get down here?”
She turns sharply and finds the guy from last night. Lee. Her stomach flips for just a second, remembering the way he looked at her. “So Apollo’s your big brother!” she teases, covering.
Lee raises an eyebrow. “Sorry if he was bothering you.”
“Did you know the cops come with dogs?” Zak asks eagerly.
Lee turns to her warily. Kara offers a shit-eating grin. “They do. They have dogs.”
“I took the train,” Zak says, answering Lee’s earlier question. “Mom was way too hungover to drive, and I wasn’t about to go in her room to get the keys. Gods only know what she would’ve done.”
Kara’s eyes leap to Lee’s. His face is frozen in shock for a moment before he blinks his eyes closed. She looks away, too. The silence stretches out. “Well, you made it!” Kara finally says to Zak. She catches Lee’s look of gratitude.
“Yeah. Hey, you should hang out with us!” Zak suggests.
She laughs. “I’ve got things to do, kid, but you have fun.” She crumples up her food wrapper and tosses it at the nearest trashcan. When it misses by an inch, Lee stretches to pick it up and drop it in. Kara laughs again. “See you ‘round, Apollo.”
***
Lee doesn’t see Starbuck for three days. He thinks he hears her a couple times at group meetings or glimpses her passing through crowds, but even then he’s not sure. While he looks for her, he turns the mystery of her over in his mind: what does she do if she doesn’t go to school? Why is she here if she doesn’t believe the protest will work? He tries to keep his mind on the facts, but what he really wants to know is if she’d let him get close to her, know her, touch her. Those fantasies ran rampant while he looks for her, too.
On the third day, even though he’s worried he’ll miss her, Lee heads downtown to his grandfather’s office. Joseph is the only one in his family who takes him seriously, and Lee promised he’d stop by. And of course that’s when he finds her.
Starbuck’s sitting cross-legged on the steps in front of the Caprica City Courthouse, a guitar nestled in her lap. Lee stops in his tracks, lost in the sight of her: her eyes are half-closed as she gives in to the music; her fingers are sliding and stroking deftly over the strings. He recognizes the rise and fall of notes, the minor chords thrilling closer and closer to release until finally they resolve with a rush of joy.
Someone jostles him in passing, leaning in to toss a few cubits into a bowl in front of Starbuck. She looks up at the clinking sound, nods to the donor, then freezes at the sight of Lee. Her fingers keep playing but she’s slipping off the rhythm. After a minute she slaps her hand flat over the strings.
They stare at each other.
“Isn’t that Nomion? Where did you learn to play like that?” he asks in a rush.
Her face goes blank.
“I didn’t mean--” Lee stammers. “Anything. Just that you’re really good.”
Starbuck drops her eyes. “My dad was a musician,” she says tightly.
Lee hesitantly moves toward her, sitting down beside her on the marble steps. “You’re really, really amazing at that,” he says softly. She smiles, a private little smile that makes his heart race with success.
“Thanks,” she mutters.
Suddenly animated, Lee gestures toward the courthouse behind them. “Have you ever been inside? My grandfather took me once and--” He breaks off as her smile vanishes.
She turns to him, opening her mouth and then closing it again. Then she shrugs. “Yeah, I’ve been in there. They had some hearings for my mom. Custody stuff.”
Starbuck is trying to sound nonchalant, but her eyes beg him not to make anything of it, so he doesn’t. Just nods and offers, “No one ever calls my mother on it.” She smiles again, and it’s tense and her eyes are still dark, but he’ll take it. “Is this what you do everyday?” Lee asks.
She shrugs. “Here or somewhere else. Everybody’s back in their offices now from lunch, though; it’ll be dead for a few hours.”
“Can I walk you back to the camp?” Lee asks.
Her eyes dance with amusement, as if she’s about to tease him, but then she answers: “Sure.”
Lee stands, holding out a hand.
She takes it, lets him pull her to her feet.
Their eyes catch, and Lee shivers as tension builds between them. He doesn’t have words for what this is, but he doesn’t ever want to let go of her hand.
“I’m Kara,” Starbuck says quickly.
He nods. “I’m Lee.”
They finally separate.
“I already knew your name,” Kara points out, grinning. She puts her guitar reverently in its case, then shoves the handful of cubits she’s earned into her pocket and packs the bowl away.
“Well, it’s nice to meet you,” he says softly.
They walk back without talking, but every so often Lee glances over at Kara and catches her looking at him.
As they near the camp, he sees her shift, her posture tighter, her smile closer to a smirk. She winks at him as she heads off toward her own part of the camp, back in character. Lee tries not to feel lost without her by his side.
II
The world around him seems different. There’s an energy in him, something new. Lee’s vibrating with it for the rest of the day, and when they gather that evening, he heads confidently for the podium.
“Hi, everyone,” he says into the megaphone. The crowd rumbles back in greeting. “I just--I want to say something that isn’t about bathrooms or who cooks what or when the park is going to kick us all out.” The group quiets, listening. Lee grins. “I want to say that we’re all here to do something remarkable, to change Caprica itself!” They’re loud then, cheering, and the rush he’s felt all day intensifies.
“There’s a lot that’s been going wrong in our society for a long time, but we’re all here to change that!” They’re yelling, some on their feet. He searches her out. “Tomorrow, we need to march to the capitol and not leave until we’re heard!” Just as everyone starts to chant, he sees her.
Kara’s standing stock still in the middle of the mass of people, her hands in fists at her sides. His stomach drops in an instant. He’s done something wrong.
She shakes her head in disgust and slips through the crowd. The two men beside her glance in surprise between her and Lee, then follow her out.
Lee stands on stage, bewildered, as the rest of the room comes together for once, shouting out suggestions. He hands the megaphone to the next person in line and heads after Kara. It’s dim when he gets out of the tent, and he takes a few running steps after her.
“What do you want, Lee?” she asks when he reaches her, her tone surly.
He shakes his head, frantic with confusion. “What happened, Kara?”
She steps closer, her eyes bright with rage. “You come in here and you act like there’s... hope. Like there’s a bright, shiny future waiting for everyone if we can just all cheer at the same time! And you know what, Lee? There’s not. You really think Caprica will listen to us? Teenagers and the unemployed and the homeless? Not in a million years. You can go back to college when this is all done and forget about us, but we will all still be right here.” Kara stops, panting from the force of what she’s said.
She’s right. And she’s gorgeous when she’s like this. So he kisses her. Leans in and cups her face in his hands and kisses her until she’s grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and dragging his body against hers.
The thought flickers through his mind that he could go without breathing if instead he gets this: the taste of Kara’s mouth, the eagerness of her lips and hands and hips. When they finally stop to gasp for air, Lee smiles against her cheek. She jerks back, worry in her face suddenly. Fear.
“I have to go,” Kara says quickly.
He blinks in confusion. “Where?” Lee asks after a beat.
“I have to,” she says, and pushes past him, taking a few running steps and disappearing into the night.
***
Lee forces himself to let her go, to wait for her to come back, and by the next morning he’s busy getting the march underway. There are signs to make and people to organize, and the University wasn’t a fluke--he’s good at this. They head for the capitol, nearly five hundred strong, with more people arriving all the time.
Downtown there’s no one to meet with, no one for them to make demands of or chant at for change, but the crowd doesn’t seem to care. They parade and cheer and Lee rides the wave of their excitement. He doesn’t see Kara, but he didn’t really expect her to come.
It’s all going well until the police forces show up, start to circle them off and slowly close in. Suddenly there’s a lot of shouting about permits and permission and public grounds and the police are looking angrier and angrier. Just as the first tasers come out, everyone starts to run. In the chaos Lee loses everyone else he knows, just bolts for the camp. All he can hear is his heart pounding.
***
They regroup there after an hour or so. Lee can see the fear on Louis and Felix’s faces, and he can hardly believe what he started. He doesn’t know what he’s doing.
Kara was right.
He’s not sure how to fix it, but he wants to kiss her again. He wants to see her grin, to give her all the bright shiny things she thinks she can’t have, whether protests are ever going to work or not. When things have settled down enough and they head for dinner, Lee’s looking around everywhere for Kara, already planning out how to apologize.
“What’s going on?” Louis asks after the third time Lee looks over his shoulder.
Lee tries to shrug. “Just looking for someone.”
Felix grins. “Anyone I know?”
He nods, smiling sheepishly. “Starbuck?”
The other two exchange a glance. “Isn’t she...?” Louis says.
“Mm.” Felix looks back at Lee.
“Isn’t she what?” he demands, brow darkening.
Louis shrugs. “She’s with those two guys. I mean, they’re poly...but that’s cool, if you’re okay with that.”
Lee freezes. Frak. All he’s done is kiss her once and already he’s fiercely jealous at the thought of someone else touching her. “She didn’t mention it.”
Felix looks at him warily. “Well, maybe they’re just friends.”
He snorts. “Maybe.” He waves them on toward dinner and heads toward the Aurora monument near Kara’s tent.
“Apollo!” someone suddenly shouts. “Hey, Apollo!”
Lee turns and finds one of Kara’s friends looming over him. He swallows hard. The other man has at least six inches on him.
“Hey, back off, Sam!” her other friend says quickly, jerking him back by his shoulder.
“What did you say to her?” Sam demands. “Where did she go?”
Lee’s expression shifts to alarm as he realizes what Sam means. “She’s gone? I haven’t seen her since last night--”
Both of them seem to deflate.
“Frak,” Sam curses under his breath, then looks at Lee. “Sorry for...” Sam waves. “Sorry.”
“I was going to look for her. Maybe she just went to play somewhere?” Lee offers.
The second man sighs. “She left her guitar.” He looks at Sam, face serious. “She can take care of herself, though. She’s tough.” He looks at Lee, holds out his hand. “Helo.”
Lee introduces himself, shakes Helo’s hand gratefully. “Where would Kara go?” he asks, frowning.
They both turn to him in surprise, and Sam starts to grin.
***
Kara stumbles back into camp, exhausted and hungover, as the sky deepens toward full dark. She heads toward dinner and collapses onto a bench across from Helo and Sam.
“Have a nice ramble?” Sam jokes.
She tries to roll her eyes but it hurts.
“Here.” Helo pushes his water across the table to her and she drinks it eagerly. As she starts to feel more human, she raises an eyebrow at the two of them.
“You’re not pissed at me.”
“Well, we were,” Sam starts, grinning. “And then we talked to someone very interesting.”
She rests her chin on her folded arms. “Uh-huh.”
“You’ll never guess what that Apollo kid wanted to know.”
Kara’s stomach sinks. “What?”
“He wanted to know where Kara had run off to.” Sam’s eyes are dancing.
Kara sits up straight, bracing herself.
“You told him your name,” Helo says, shaking his head in awe.
“She told him her name,” Sam agrees earnestly.
“Yeah, yeah,” Kara mutters.
“Oh, no,” Helo says, “this is a big deal. Miss Kara Thrace, who had more aliases in the system than anyone I’ve ever met, told a boy she barely knows her real name.”
“I think maybe these kids are in love,” Sam adds, teasing. “He even asked if I’m Kara’s boyfriend, or whatever.”
Kara huffs. “Just shut up, both of you. Right frakking now.” They laugh as they tuck into their food. Then she looks up sharply as she realizes what he said. “What did you tell him?”
Sam pauses, his eyes growing serious. “I told him we’re family.”
She sighs softly, looking back at him, then nods. “Okay.”
“So why’d you run away from him?” Helo asks after a few minutes have passed.
She shakes her head. “He kissed me.”
“Yeah.” Helo sighs, and they eat in silence.
Kara closes her eyes, starts to doze. It’s something only these two have ever really understood: people either leave or stay. There’s no use letting the ones who’ll leave you break your heart.
***
It’s too loud in the camp, so Kara takes Helo’s water bottle and heads to the edge, sitting on the boundary wall where she first saw Lee. For a long time she watches the cars pass by, trying to block out everything else.
“Hey,” he says softly behind her, laying a hand on her shoulder.
She can’t deny the way her stomach flips when he touches her, the slow burn it ignites. “Hey,”
she answers.
Lee throws a leg over the wall, settles beside her. “We went the capitol,” he says after a minute.
“I heard.”
“It didn’t do any good.” He sighs, and Kara can hear the disappointment in his voice.
“You really believe that stuff,” she says, and even though she knows it’s hopeless, she finds it a little endearing. “You think you can change things.”
Lee meets her eyes, his face intent. A passing car illuminates him briefly and she’s struck by his beauty. “Don’t you?” he asks. “Somebody has to. I mean, why else are you here?”
Kara recoils, stares into the night. “We needed somewhere to sleep.”
She jumps off the wall and heads into the park, unable to look him in the eye. But he follows her and she’s glad. They wander past the tents and up a hill. The sounds of the road are distant here and the stars are bright, at least for the city. Kara drops down to the grass.
Lee stands over her, blocking the stars out.
“Well?” Kara finally says lightly.
“Okay.” He sits beside her.
Their shoulders just barely touch, but she can feel the heat of his body. Kara points, pressing more firmly into him. “There’s Persephone,” she says. “See the cluster of pomegranate seeds?”
“Yeah,” Lee says uncertainly.
“Do you know the story? Hades took her to the underworld to be his wife, and her mother mourned. Eventually she got her back, but because of the seeds, Persephone was never free.” Kara lays back, tracing the constellation with her eyes.
Lee looks down at her. “I don’t know that one.”
Kara shrugs, the grass tickling her neck. “For a while I lived in a foster home with a poly, religious family. One of the moms liked to read us myths. I always liked that one, it was like me, going back and forth between the safe place and hell.”
“Foster care was that bad?” He sounds worried.
Kara doesn’t answer. Instead, she reaches for his hand, weaves her fingers through his. She feels the same snap of connection from yesterday, hears Lee’s breath catch. A shiver of anticipation runs through her. “What’s your favorite?” she asks, nodding up at the stars.
He eases down beside her. “Don’t laugh,” he says.
Kara giggles. “Too late.”
Lee points. “Baucis and Philemon. See the two arcs, meeting just there. My parents never really... I just like the idea of forever...” When she doesn’t answer, he turns.
Kara looks at him, fighting the urge to--she’s not sure. Cry, maybe. She raises up on an elbow, leaning over him, and does the only thing she can: she kisses him.
For a moment it’s slow and soft, but then Lee tugs her closer and they’re lying together, her breasts pressed into his chest, and their kisses grow urgent. Kara moans as Lee rolls them over, his weight pinning her down, and he presses his lips down the side of her throat. For just a moment she gives herself completely to the sensation of him, lets go.
Then sirens explode around them, lights and megaphones and dogs barking and Kara’s on her feet and running, as fast as she can, before she’s even had time to think.
Lee is right behind her as they reach the boundary wall and vault over it, and they’re across the street and into the city. It’s only blocks later, stumbling to a halt, that Kara realizes she’s lost him.
***
The arrest is a shock of chaos that seems to play out in silence, officers mouthing words Lee can’t hear over the sirens as they shove him into the back of a car. Most of the protesters seem to be cordoned off but not in custody, though here and there another breaks free of the group and gets dragged off. Before the scene has finished playing out, the car Lee’s in takes off, siren wailing over his head.
He can still feel the softness of her lips, but as he stares out into the night, Lee wonders if he’ll ever see Kara again.
III
Lee sits on the floor of the holding cell, leaning against the wall, head in his hands. He hasn’t been charged with anything--even the police don’t seem exactly sure what they’d charge him with. The others in the cell seem far less concerned with their futures: a drunk man is snoring on the one cot, and a couple of women, possibly prostitutes, have taken the bench. Lee’s not sure where the other protesters have been taken.
He can’t imagine what his father’s going to say.
The door at the end of the hall opens. Lee hears the jingling of keys and the heavy scuff of an officer’s boots.
“You’re going to uncuff me, right?” a girl’s voice asks impetuously, and Lee’s head pops up.
Kara smirks as she struts down the corridor in front of the guard, then gives him a wink as she’s nudged inside inside the cell. The man reaches through the bars to take off her cuffs, and Kara rubs her wrists, arms swinging free. Lee can’t quite figure out what’s happening, but he’s grinning like an idiot.
She heads toward him as the guard leaves, a hint of self-consciousness in her smile. She shrugs, standing over him.
Lee shakes his head, then peers closely at her and realizes there’s a darkening bruise on her cheekbone. “What the hell happened?” he demands.
Kara shrugs. “Kicked a cop car. Couldn’t leave you alone in here. They’ll let us out in the morning, and I figured it’s warmer than a tent for the night.” She drops and sits at his side.
He wants to protest, to tell her she shouldn’t have, to get angry at the cops... but all he can think is that she came for him. She’s here at his side. Lee slowly takes her hand, and Kara smiles, squeezing back.
“They should let us out in the morning,” she repeats softly, bravado fading from her tone. “There might be fines.”
“You’ve done this before?” he asks. He’d thought she was joking with Zak.
Kara avoids his eyes. “Yeah. I got picked up for shoplifting a couple times. And once for attacking one of the other foster kids, but that was his fault.”
Lee nods. “I haven’t.”
She laughs. “No, of course not.”
“Kara.”
She looks at him shyly as he invokes her name.
“Thanks.”
She nods, presses a kiss to his cheek, and shifts, resting her head on his shoulder. “So Lee,” she says after a minute, “since we’ve got all night... tell me your story.”
So he does. For more than an hour he tells her about his father’s occasional presence in his life, his mother’s drinking habits, his brother’s hero-worship. About the pressure to go to War College instead of Apollo University, and how his father is still reminding him it’s not too late to transfer and get his wings. About how he follows the rules, all the time, trying to keep things going smoothly, but he’s not sure he really believes in any of it at all. Lee’s never said any of this out loud before; some of it he’s never even articulated to himself. But as he finishes, he feels calmer. Kara’s fingers are still woven through his own, and he knows she’s not going anywhere.
“What about you?” Lee finally asks, and feels Kara stiffen at the question. He tugs at her hand until she looks at him. “You can trust me.”
She nods, and holds on tight for a moment before she starts. He’s gotten hints of this before, but it’s worse than he ever imagined. Her mother driving her father out, abusing young Kara but denying it just convincingly enough for Family Services to return her daughter to her care over and over again. Kara paints it for him with broad strokes, but the way she hides her free hand in her lap tells the rest of the story.
The parts that aren’t about her mother, Kara tells with greater ease. She smiles as she describes meeting Helo, another child of the system, and finding him over and over in different foster placements. Next came Sam when they were nearly fifteen, suddenly orphaned when his parents died in a freak accident. There’s a kind of awe in Kara’s voice when she describes the three of them together, sharing an attic bedroom in the home of a poly family that genuinely cared about them, the first time she ever really felt loved. Lee begins to understand what Sam meant when he said they were family. She describes their closeness, alludes to their sexual explorations, and even as he tenses with jealousy, Lee can see it, can’t help understanding.
“Then we turned eighteen,” Kara says tightly, “all three of us within a few months. We were with a hard family then, and we each took the hundred cubits and left.” She shrugs. “Together it was enough to buy a tent, and some food. I still had my dad’s guitar. We’ve survived.”
Lee shakes his head. He can’t even imagine not having his family to rely on, screwed up as it is. “What about your mom?” he asks hesitantly.
She doesn’t answer, and when he glances over, Kara’s staring at her knees. “I went,” she whispers. “This morning.” Her face is closed off, but Lee can see the horror of it in her eyes. “She has cancer. I tried to--to talk to her about it, but she started screaming, about how I left her just like my dad.” Kara closes her eyes. “Then she started throwing things, so I left.”
Lee traces the bruise on her cheek, his shoulders tight with fury. It was dusk already when he saw her earlier, and he can’t help wondering. He can’t stand that he’s wondering.
Kara shakes her head, pulling away from his touch.
He lets go of her hand so he can wrap his arms around her shoulders, pulling her closer against him. He can feel her breath against his throat, and aches with how terribly he wants to protect her. Kara nestles closer, and Lee tightens his embrace. They sit that way for a long time.
Eventually they fall asleep.
***
The door to the main part of the police station clangs open loudly, and Kara jerks upright. Lee’s arm is still around her, and he squeezes her shoulder as she yawns.
“Adama,” the guard says, flattening out the vowels. Kara looks up sharply, focused on the older man beside him with faded Tauron tattoos. She’d bet he’s the grandfather Lee described just a few hours ago.
“Your mother is furious,” Joseph says, looking down at them.
Lee shrugs, then glances at Kara. “Can you get her out, too?”
Joseph meets her eyes, and Kara tries not to flinch. She’s not sure what he’s looking for, but after a moment, he nods. “I’ll see what I can do.”
They rise together and follow the officer. He returns her switchblade and cigarette lighter as she shifts uncomfortably under Joseph’s eyes.
“Thank you,” Kara says sincerely as they head out of the building, everything finally resolved. Lee’s grandfather’s legal knowledge and quick talking has gotten them both off with warnings instead of fines. Kara will have to burn the alias she gave, but that’s it.
“Don’t worry about it.” For the first time since he arrived, Joseph smiles. “Now come on, Evelyn will want to fuss over the two of you.”
Kara freezes, halfway down the marble steps to the street. “I really shouldn’t--I’ll be fine back at--”
“Absolutely not,” Joseph’s voice gets just a touch harder. “You could both use a hot meal and some real sleep.” He turns toward Lee. “I’m hardly sending you back to Carolanne for that. No, come on, I’m parked over here.”
Kara looks to Lee and he nods, reaching for her hand again. Against her better judgment, she takes it.
***
The Adamas’ home is in one of the stately uptown neighborhoods. As Joseph leads Lee and Kara inside, she looks around nervously. Nothing here is gaudy; everything is elegant. Joseph sets his keys in a low porcelain bowl and nods up the stairs. “Why don’t you two get settled in the guest room? Evelyn’s not up yet and I’m sure you could use some sleep.”
They do as he says. Kara relaxes slightly when she’s alone with Lee. He keeps touching her, taking her hand or running his fingers down her back, and she’s both comforted by it and more and more tantalized, her whole body snapping to attention at the merest touch.
“I think I’ll shower,” Lee mutters, letting go of her abruptly as they make it into the guest room. He glances at her nervously and Kara hides a grin at his reaction to being alone with her and a bed.
“Okay,” she says, and lies back to wait.
The quilt beneath her is incredibly comfortable, and Kara runs her fingers over it lightly. To have something like this just for guests! It’s almost inconceivable. As she hears the shower start, Kara slips out into the hallway, exploring the pictures that run down the stairs. She sees Lee with his mother and father--it’s picturesque in spite of all the hidden drama. On the landing is a larger photo from his graduation the year before. Lee’s holding his diploma, grinning proudly. Zak is wearing an ApolloU sweatshirt, showing off his brother’s accomplishment.
Kara grits her teeth at the reminder: no matter what he says, Lee has a future waiting for him. And not one that involves a homeless street musician with more scars than she can count. Aching, Kara eases down the rest of the stairs.
“Going somewhere?” Joseph asks softly.
She whirls, stammers. “My friends will be worried about me--the police--”
Joseph nods, cutting her off. “Come have a cup of tea,” he says firmly.
Kara slowly follows him into the kitchen.
Lee’s grandfather sets on the water and takes out mugs. The kitchen is surprisingly unautomated--most older people Kara’s seen still try to cling to the old conveniences. But there are cabinets here instead of dispensers, and a broom in the corner instead of a robovac.
As Joseph sets her tea on the counter, he nods to the small tattoo inside Kara’s wrist: a little black triangle. “Have you given a son away in marriage?” he asks, his eyes teasing.
She shrugs. “My friends and I made them up. We’re not Tauron, we just liked the idea. Bonding yourself to other people...” Her voice trails off as he nods.
“I looked you up, Kara,” Joseph says softly.
She freezes, staring at him, ready to bolt.
“The police may not have run it, but they took a DNA sample from you back there, and there’s a fair amount of information about you in the system.”
Kara swallows hard. She can’t believe he didn’t just let her leave when he had the chance.
Joseph sips his tea slowly. “I don’t come to this lifestyle by birth,” he says then. He waits for Kara to meet his eyes. “My brother and I lost our parents early, and did what we had to, to stay alive. The system on Tauron has even less to say for it than Caprica’s.”
Kara nods, her fear easing slightly.
“As long as you’re a guest of Lee’s, you’re welcome in my home.” Joseph glances up as the sound of running water from the upstairs bathroom cuts off.
She stares into her tea, overwhelmed by sudden emotion. “Thank you,” Kara whispers.
Joseph nods. “Go on. I expect he’ll be looking for you.”
Kara smiles, and heads upstairs. In the bedroom Lee is dressed in sweats, his eyes dark with exhaustion. He tosses an extra pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt to her. Kara grabs them and heads into the bathroom. When she comes out again, Lee is under the covers, fast asleep. Kara looks down at him fondly, then draws the curtains against the early morning light and slides into bed beside him.
***
Lee wakes up warm and well-rested for the first time in a week. He stretches, yawning, and his fingers brush something soft. His eyes open: it’s Kara’s hair. And there she is, staring back with a smile. His chest swells at the sight of her.
“Hey,” Kara says quietly.
“Good morning,” he answers, grinning.
She glances toward the windows and wrinkles her nose. “I’m pretty sure it’s afternoon by now, Apollo.”
He glares at her use of the nickname and reaches out, tickling her until she’s squirming and laughing. His hands still, wrapped around her ribs where her t-shirt has ridden up. Lee meets her eyes uncertainly, not sure how far Kara wants to take this. Her eyes are dark as her tongue flicks out, wetting her lips, and she’s certainly not protesting now. Lee dips his head, pressing his lips against her.
Kara sighs as their mouths open and the kiss deepens. The heat between them grows steadily, and they press eagerly toward one another. Lee’s hand slides up, cupping Kara’s breast as she arches into his touch. Lee drops his head to tease her with his tongue and she grabs at his hair and frak, he wants her.
“Is this okay?” Lee asks as he reaches for the edge of Kara’s pants, pulling back for a moment. He’s been with his share of college girls, and a couple of girlfriends in high school, but whatever this is with Kara is something else entirely.
“Don’t you dare stop,” she begs, her hands on his shoulders pulling him back to her. “Just get a condom.”
Lee nods, slipping out of bed and reaching for his jeans. He’s just glad the police didn’t bother to confiscate these; he can’t imagine his grandfather seeing them in the rest of his possessions. He tears one off and heads back to bed.
Kara’s stripped off her t-shirt and sweatpants, and is lying spread before him. As Lee stares down at her hungrily, she sits up and swings her legs over the side of the bed, reaching for the condom.
He’s impossibly hard as she shoves down his pants. Kara’s fist closes around his cock and Lee groans, struggling to keep control of himself. She strokes him hard and fast. Lee grabs her wrist, meets her teasing eyes. Kara pulls away and rips open the packet, slides the condom onto him, then moves backward on the bed so he can position himself over her.
“Come on, Lee,” Kara whispers.
He nods and holds her eyes as he strokes his fingers through the wet heat between her legs. Kara’s whole body jerks at the sensation and he grins, then aligns their bodies and slowly thrusts into her. He can’t even contain how good it feels. Then she whimpers and he’s moving, surging into her over and over as Kara wraps her legs around him and urges him on.
She’s louder than he expected and Lee kisses Kara deep as she starts to thrash beneath him, swallowing her cries. Her body tightens around him as orgasm washes through her, and the sensation is so intense Lee follows her into pleasure with a few final thrusts.
Lee rolls to the side, holding Kara against him. He’s never felt like this before.
As they lie together, catching their breath, Kara seems to have caught his hesitance from earlier. After a few minutes, she sits up, sliding off the bed. “We should probably get back to the camp,” she says, her voice faintly hoarse.
“Yeah,” he says, content to look at her as she moves around collecting her clothes.
“I’m just going to shower. While we’re here.”
Lee nods. “Go ahead.” She goes into the bathroom and he hears the water start. As he lays in bed, body limp with pleasure, Lee grins. He finally knows what he wants.
IV
Kara slinks into the camp, speeding her pace slightly so Lee falls a step behind her. She’s halfway back to her tent when Helo appears, his face raw with relief, and wraps her in his arms.
“Frak, Starbuck, we thought they’d got you,” he says as he hugs her close.
She shrugs as he lets her go. “They did, but just for a minute.”
Helo nods in worry, then his eyes twinkle as he sees Lee behind her. “They got both of you?”
Kara glares. “Shut up.”
“Well I’ll go tell Sam you’re alive,” Helo mutters, and nods to Lee as he heads off.
She blushes as she turns to face Lee, her hands on her hips. He stares back at her, grinning with adoration, and a little rush of pleasure runs through her. Lee wants her, and the rest of it doesn’t matter. Kara steps closer, leans up to give him a quick kiss.
“So...do you want to share my tent with me?” Lee asks nervously.
Kara giggles.
He rolls his eyes. “I just mean--” He shakes his head. “I want you to, is all.”
She swallows hard. She feels like she’s flying, or maybe falling. “For tonight,” is all she says.
***
Lee’s not sure how he got this lucky. As the next few days pass, Kara is never far from his side. They don’t talk about it again, but she spend every night in his tent. No matter how Louis and Felix glare at them in the morning, Lee delights in being with her, is drunk on the pleasure of Kara’s body and the way she makes him feel. As long as he’s with her it couldn’t matter less that he’s not sure what he’s doing or whether he can really change the world.
They seem to be settling into their relationship when he makes the mistake of calling it one.
“This is just a fling, Lee,” Kara snaps. They’re wandering the park, searching out a moment of privacy, and Lee stops short, chilled by her words.
“How can you say that?” he demands. “After all that we’ve...”
Kara shakes her head, her eyes vulnerable. “How much longer do you have here? A week? Then it’s back to school for Apollo.” She holds his gaze, challenging him. “That was always your plan.”
Lee feels like he can’t breathe. “Well, you can come, too! There’s plenty of room in my apartment, and you can start taking classes, you’re smart for frak’s sake, Kara, and--”
“No.” She steps further away from him, and the night grows cold.
Lee’s eyes harden. “What are you going to do here? Keep camping out forever? Even when you don’t think it’ll change anything?”
Kara whirls, striding away, her hands clenched tight. “This is my life, Lee.”
He heads after her, catching her shoulder. “You can change it, Kara! Maybe you can’t change the world, but you can change this. And I’ll help you. That’s what being in a relationship means.”
“Believe me, Lee,” she answers, tense under his hand, “I don’t need your pity or your help.”
“That wasn’t--”
She takes off, at a run this time, and Lee stares after her, not even sure what he’s done wrong.
***
Kara stumbles out into the city, heads toward the nearest dive bar. She orders an ambrosia, slapping down all the money she earned that day with a mumble to keep it coming.
She’s not sure where she thought it would go. Frak. She should never have stopped running the first time, after he kissed her and the whole world seemed to spin around them. Kara knocks back the first shot of liquor, trying not to cry. If Sam and Helo are all she has, that’s still a lot. She certainly doesn’t need Lee Adama. But no matter how many times she repeats it, it never quite seems true.
Time passes, one long blur of shot glasses, and then Sam settles onto the stool next to her.
“Want me to beat him up?” he asks seriously.
Kara half-laughs, then nearly chokes on her drink. “No,” she says softly. “He’s not worth it.”
“Okay, good,” Sam says, lifting the glass out of her hand and finishing it off. “He seems like a nice enough kid.”
She winces, her shoulders sinking. “He is just a kid,” she nods. “And this is just his vacation.”
Sam rests a hand on the back of her neck, and waves the bartender away. “Let’s go home,” he says softly. “Helo promises to read you a bedtime story if you agree not to kick in your sleep.”
Kara grins, and lets him tug her off of her chair. She sways and Sam catches her. He supports her as they head out into the night, cross the street back toward the park. Kara scuffs her feet along the sidewalk, glancing away toward Lee’s tent, and for a moment a sense of loss hits her again.
“Kara?” Sam asks gently.
She shakes her head. “Nothing.”
***
Lee hovers on her periphery the next day at breakfast, and at the group meeting, spends the next day standing across the street listening to her play. Kara ignores him as hard as she can, trying not to think about what it felt like to sleep in his arms and really trust that she was safe. Gods, she was a fool.
She’s vaguely aware that Helo and Sam are running interference, keeping Lee at a distance whenever he comes past their tent. After the second day she snaps at them to stop, that a week was hardly enough for some college kid to be anything more to her than a quick frak. She’s not sure if they do stop or if they just get better at it, but things seem to go back to normal.
Kara wanders back into the camp the next day, the strap of her guitar case across her chest, when she sees the news vans. She stops short, edging around the crowd.
“What’s going on?” she mutters to one of Lee’s friends.
He turns to her in surprise, then gestures to the cameras. “The Mayor’s thinking about closing park. The Greystones have been complaining that this land was donated and developed by them and the Mayor should kick us all out.”
“And their protests matter more,” Kara snorts.
He shrugs. “Exactly. There’s no news yet on what the Mayor will do, but the media finally seem to care.”
Kara nods and keeps walking. The reporters are everywhere, interviewing everyone. She dodges one who tries to wave a microphone in her face, but as she reaches her own section of the camp she freezes at the sight of Lee, face earnest and open, talking to one of the cameras.
Creeping closer, Kara tries to hear.
“And what is it the protesters want?” the woman interviewing him asks.
Lee opens his mouth, but takes a long moment before answering. “We’re here for a lot of different reasons,” he finally says. “I can only speak for myself.” He looks up then, straight at Kara.
She feels the same bolt of connection she’s always felt with him and quickly closes her eyes. But when she opens them he’s still there.
“There’s a lot that’s wrong with Caprican society,” Lee says, speaking to the camera but also to her. “We don’t take care of each other the way we need to, there’s vast inequality between the people at the top and all the people, many of them children, who are at the bottom. We live in a place where those kids grow up thinking they don’t have a future worth fighting for. And that’s not the way it should be. In the end there’s no future for our world, for any of the worlds, unless things change.” His eyes are bright, his tone insistent. Kara holds her breath, trying to hear every word.
“Do you think that this protest will achieve the kind of world you’re talking about?” the reporter asks skeptically.
Lee meets Kara’s eyes for a moment more, his face shifting from hope to resolve. “No,” he says. “I don’t. There’s energy here, and that’s good, we need energy, but we also need strategy. I don’t have all the words, or all the answers, but my grandfather...he’s a civil rights lawyer. He’s dedicated his whole career to trying to help people and groups of people have the lives they deserve. I think maybe that’s the place to start. And when I get back to University next week, I’m planning to study law.”
Kara sighs, nodding. Even though it hurts, she smiles at him, with something that feels like pride.
Before she has time to step away, the woman with the camera has swung around, is pointing at her. “What’s your name?” she asks brightly.
Kara takes a stumbling step back, but there’s nowhere to go, and Lee’s waiting for her to answer. “Starbuck,” she says, jutting her chin out defiantly.
The woman hardly bats an eye. “What’s brought you to Greystone Park, Starbuck?”
She takes a deep breath. “The system is frakked,” she bites out. “Like Lee said. This whole society is frakked to hell and back. Nothing’s fair about the way the world works.”
“And are you going to be a lawyer, too?” the reporter prompts.
Kara starts to shake her head, then stops. “I’m not sure yet,” she says slowly. “But we have to do something. We have to make it fair.” Beyond the camera Lee breaks out in a grin and Kara tries to hold in the smile threatening to spread across her own face.
“Hey, CapCity News, check this out!” Sam yells, running up behind her and mooning the camera. Kara bursts into giggles as the reporter and her camera man quickly head in the other direction. But when Sam turns to drive Lee away next, Kara grabs his arm and shakes her head.
Sam winks and heads in the other direction.
“You’re going to talk to me, now?” Lee asks. His tone is sharp, but she can hear in his voice that he’s been hurt by her avoiding him.
Kara drops her eyes. “I liked what you said, just now.” She hazards a glance at him. “I think you might be right about some of that.”
Lee leans in closer, tilting his ear toward her. “Could you say that again?”
She grins, laughing as the tension breaks. “In your dreams, Apollo.”
“Yeah?” he grabs her around her waist. “I have been having some dreams...” His lips close over hers, and Kara’s knees go weak as he kisses her surely. She clings to him for a moment, her arms around his neck.
“You have a future,” Lee whispers, pulling back far enough to see her. “You can go to school, or be a musician, or live in a tent for the rest of your life. You just have to believe it.”
She’s not sure if it’s the light of day or the honesty in his eyes or the way his body is driving her to distraction, but in that moment, Kara believes him. She kisses him again, harder.
Helo catcalls. “Get a room.”
Kara stretches out her hand to flip him off without letting go of Lee. She hears Helo laugh.
Lee pulls her tighter against him. “I do have a tent,” he murmurs against her lips, and she nods emphatically, lets him lead her through the swirling crowd.
Kara ducks into his tent and turns, looking up at him. She’s startled to find Lee staring down at her, something like anger in his eyes. “What is it?” she asks, her stomach dropping.
He frowns for a second, then kneels in front of her. “I don’t know what this is, Kara. But I’m not kidding. It’s more than a fling, it’s more than a frak, and I know you haven’t had a lot of people stick by you but you have to stop running away from me.”
She fights the urge to bolt. It helps that he’s blocking the only exit.
Lee reaches out, cupping her cheek, and his touch instantly grounds her. “I kept trying to find you, but I could never think of what I’d say. I don’t...I can’t imagine just walking away from this. I can’t imagine ever finding this again with anyone else.”
It almost hurts, how good it feels to hear him say it. Kara laughs to cover the sob she can feel welling in her chest. “Good,” she bites out, blinking away tears.
He smiles, incandescent. “Good,” Lee whispers.
She presses herself into his arms, kissing him hard. Lee shudders against her, rolling her down into the tangled blankets. His body is heavy on hers; he’s already hard and his hands pull eagerly at her clothing. Kara runs her hands under his shirt, scratching at his back as she bucks against him.
Lee groans and she laughs, pulling at his fly, lifting her hips as he jerks her jeans down. “So good,” she teases, then loses her breath all together as he covers her mouth with his, his hands groping and stroking in all the right places.
Before when he touched her she was counting down in her head: how many fraks were left, how many days until Lee Adama packed his bags and headed back into the world. Kara arches her back as Lee finally slides into her, her legs wrapping around his hips. She’s not counting anymore, not thinking of anything but the power of him inside her, the intimacy of him panting her name in her ear as he comes.
There are no words for it at all.
***
Long past midnight, Kara lies awake in Lee’s arms, stroking her fingers over the muscled planes of his body. He squirms as she finds a new ticklish spot and she grins.
Suddenly the sirens begin again. In the distance bullhorns are announcing something unintelligible. Outside it isn’t the usual raid; there aren’t just cops and dogs. Greystone security forces are approaching, tearing down tents and shoving people into the street.
Lee and Kara scramble into their clothes, and this time as they go over the fence they’re side by side.
Half a mile later, they finally slow to a walk. Lee reaches out his hand, and Kara takes it. Ahead of them, visible between the rows of skyscrapers, is the capitol. The world around them is silent, the night air cool and still.
“So what do we do now?” Lee asks, glancing over his shoulder at the police lights in the distance.
Kara stops, gazing up the marble steps. She squeezes his hand, feels the rush of connection. The light in his eyes says he feels it, too. She grins. “Fight ‘em til we can’t.”
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